Oh wow, that's really hard. It's hard to go from a couple to "just being friends" when you haven't seen him for two years. All those memories are going to come back. I would say the best thing to do is avoid him. Avoid hanging out as friends. It is soooooo hard, but it's worth it. You will heal that way. You will be able to focus on other stuff---i.e. living your life your way--instead of thinking about him. The less contact you have with him the better---I speak from experience! I followed people's "no contact" advice (not wanting to) and was pleasantly suprised that it does work! Why does he need you as a friend, when it's only going to mess with your heart? He's a big boy, surely he has other friends he can hang out with. I think it's selfish of him to expect you to be able to hang out as friends, when he didn't contact you for a year. I think you have every right to not contact him. And not provide a reason.